Paully Dee

Blonde. Tight. Sexy. With a voice heavenly in and out of the shower, Lance Bass is the man for me.

This former singer of one of the ‘90s greatest boy bands (if not the greatest band of all time, ever) is as foxy as ever. Lance’s smile disarms me even when I’m at my most volatile. His chest is a landing pad for my love plane.

When Lance looks at you with those penetrating light green eyes and says something like, “Hey handsome, let’s get out of this hair-gel convention and go to Maui,” you have no choice but to respond, “Yes Lance, take me there.”

I first met Lance while he scoured the nation for his Free Lance Entertainment talent search. There he was and there I was and before we knew it we were in each other’s arms. Unfortunately, Lance and I had to hide our sexual exploits from the public (which neither of us wanted to do) due to his remaining in the closet.

But why is Lance the best member of N-SYNC, other than the aforementioned reasons?

First of all,  Lancey-poo was almost an astronaut, for Pete’s sake! He almost went to space! Almost… but, like I said to him after he didn’t come crashing to the earth in a flaming metallic phallic symbol, “You’re still out of this world.”

Also, Lance can dance. Sure sure, JT can dance, but all those other fools, they don’t know how to drop a beat on the dance floor.

Also, Lance rhymes with a lot of stuff. Like dance, and pants, and chance – so what does that mean? I can say crazy stuff like “Give me a chance, Lance.” Or, “let’s take off our pants Lance.” I could even say, “do a sexy dance, Lance, now take off your pants and give love a chance.” His last name is even rhyme-tastic (like those songs that JT took credit for but Lancey-poor obviously wrote) – I mean Bass? It rhymes with mass, UMass, le cassé (French for castle), and, of course, ass. So, “Lance take off your pants. Bass, I’d like to see your bum.”

WTF does Fatone rhyme with?

So, in summation, Lance Bass is the best because he can sing, dance, astronaut, strip, obscure his sexuality, and rhyme his name. Thus, Lancey-poo is the guy for me.

Chizzists

Let’s be completely honest here. There really is only one member of Sync worth a damn and his name is Justin…Justin Timberlake. I just can’t say enough about this guy! He’s a quadruple threat. The man can sing, he can dance, he can act, and finally we must all admit he is damn good looking. Let’s try and forget those days of frosted lip-gloss. At the moment when it comes to Nsync hotness JT obviously has it on lock—but what of the other, less important human beings in that concoction of pop goodness known the world over as Nsync?

 No other member possesses the chiseled jaw or the effortless hair that JC Chasez is famous for. Just say that name and tell me how you feel after uttering it. Joshua Scott Chasez was probably born on the most beautiful of mornings on clear, dew dropped August day—August 8th 1976 to be exact. Look at that face. It’s inspiring. Every time I view that heavenly visage I feel like writing a poem—I feel like reciting every single line from every song in West Side Story. There’s just no compare. Everyone else in that group is just ordinary compared to the classically, well proportioned features of Joshua Scott. Lance Bass are you serious?! Three letters stand out to me whenever I say that name. How old is this guy? He still looks sixteen!

 Every member of Nsync has their own personality but JC is the whole package, I mean Lance Bass is nice and I appreciate the fact that he’s the kind of guy you can bring home to mom and dad and say “hey, this is my good friend from school and we’re going to go upstairs and do some math right now. Don’t worry, we’ll leave the door open!” Can you imagine having to anything so ridiculous as that to your folks when you bring someone like JC home? Puhleez! You’re better off telling them “get ready for grand kids!”