The ideal college experience is something that many students are aware of. The typical goal is to get your bachelor’s by the time you’re 23, but for many college students in Boston, that straightforward path simply isn’t realistic. I’m a transfer student here at UMass Boston, and the academic path I had set for myself did not go according to plan. However, I learned a lot of important lessons along the way.
As a first-generation Latina who comes from a low-income household, I was excited to be the first in my family to attend college, but as I looked through my financial aid packages with my parents, we realized that sacrifices had to be made. After looking through my options, I decided that Bunker Hill Community College was the place to start, since financial aid drastically lowered the cost of attendance to the point where it became manageable. Unfortunately, due to health reasons, there were breaks in my learning that resulted in my associate’s degree taking five years instead of two. I felt embarrassed that my journey looked so different from what I wanted, and it often affected my mental state.
After long conversations with friends and family, therapists and mentors, I realized that the only thing getting in the way of my happiness was my own self-doubt. I diminished my accomplishments because, in my eyes, it was all or nothing; I either got my bachelor’s in four years or I failed. I felt like there was no pride in getting my associate’s degree because it was simply something that should be done.
These negative thoughts began to affect my self-confidence, until one day I realized that I was holding myself to a path that was never definite in the first place. My story is being written with every step I take, meaning that there will be times when my path and even my destination may change, and that is okay. While this isn’t the way I imagined my educational journey to look, I still ended up in a place where I can say I’m happy. I encountered obstacles that tried to steer me off course, but I continued on.
During my time at Bunker Hill Community College, I heard similar stories from the people around me. Some of the people at Bunker Hill had children, which postponed their education. Some had jobs and families to worry about, and some were even international students just trying to navigate their new lives. There’s something beautiful and humbling about all these people from different walks of life ending up in the same little class of twenty students.
These people were climbing mountains every day, yet still found the strength to smile upon reaching the top. There should be pride in overcoming all of our obstacles, because they only add beauty to our story. Even though my journey took longer than expected, with a few breaks and opportunities for sightseeing along the way, I can say I look back at my progress with pride.
And now, my path has brought me here to UMass Boston, writing this article for The Mass Media. Some people may not understand exactly what I’ve gone through, but I know there are those who see themselves in these words. I often think about what I would tell my younger self as she’s actively going through all of these emotions and internal conflicts. These next few pieces of advice are things that I’ve heard from my mentors, as well as things I just learned on my own. They offered me guidance through hard times, and I still reflect on them to this day.
Remember that life has never been, nor will it ever be a race. Some things take longer for some people, and no matter what the world tries to say, that’s okay. Self-doubt is a natural part of the human condition, but I know now that I’ve gotten to this point because I never gave up. We’re all here on this planet at the same time, connecting with each other through these words on a page, experiencing this world and its motions for the first time together.
It has taken me a long time to be comfortable with the stalemates between life’s transitions. There are so many things that are out of my control, and the only constant in life is change. Now that I realize that I myself am also constantly changing and evolving, along with the path that I walk on, these moments that would have previously brought me anxiety are now welcomed with gratitude.
So every week, I try to take the time to embrace the journey and my accomplishments, no matter how small. To allow myself to feel all the excitement that I constantly rob myself of. As cliché as it sounds, there truly is no better time to start being happy than today. I don’t have to wait until I finish my classes, pass my exams or even graduate. We are allowed to be happy regardless of where we are on our journey, simply because every step is worth celebrating.
We’re approaching the end of this semester, which was my first at UMass Boston, and while it was challenging, we’ve truly reached a milestone together. So allow yourself to get excited! I know we just met, but I am truly proud of how far you’ve come, and you should be too. Thank you for allowing me to be vulnerable in my articles these past few months, as this was a new experience for me. Hopefully, you found yourself relating to some of the words I wrote and realized that, as humans, we’re not always alone in our struggles.
