Brangelina stand their ground in wedding rumor frenzy. The pair has yet to confirm their reported pending nuptials, though sources say they are planning a small ceremony before Angie has the twins she is pretending aren’t there. The pair has said in the past they are committed to raising their children, not necessarily to marriage. The loose-lipped source says it’ll be a family affair, with all of the kids involved in the ceremony-just not the ones in her stomach, because they don’t exist, right?

Joe Jonas plays with dolls. Well, not actually-but he is quite fond of Bratz star Chelsea Staub. The pair has been seen canoodling all around Hollywood, breaking the hearts of many teenage girls and pedophiles the world over. While JoJon’s rep denies the two are an item, one can only hope MGA toy company comes out with a new Bratz guy: G.I. Jonas.

Daniel Smith’s death ruled accidental overdose. Allegations in the death of Anna Nicole’s 20-year-old son, Daniel, who died in the Bahamas in 2006, have finally been laid to rest, literally. I thought we determined this, like, two months after he passed away, but apparently not. A two-hour trial concluded that no criminal charges will be pressed and that his death was due to an accidental lethal combination of drugs. Perpetual creeps Howard K. Stern and Larry Birkhead were in the building for the final verdict, ready to scavenge for some more press and money in the wake of a tragedy

Heidi Montag called a “feminist hero.” Yes, you read that right. New York Times journalist Gina Bellafante called the peroxide-parasite a “feminist hero” for not conceding to her on again/off-again boyfriend Spencer Pratt. She was ever grateful, saying she definitely considered herself to be a “feminist.” When asked who her own feminist heroes were, Montag drew a blank. That’s OK Susan B. Anthony-go back to getting your boob job, wearing mini skirts, and creating unattainable and unreasonable standards of beauty, you fierce feminist, you!