Tuesday, April 1710:34 AM: Petty Larceny begins our week of crime on the tenth floor of the Healey Library.

Wednesday, April 188:10 AM: False fire alarm reported in Wheatley. Alarm set off due to mechanical dysfunction. A report was taken.9:34 AM: Campus police assisted the Boston Police Department on Morrissey Blvd. in search of a stolen cab. Sounds like the plot to a bad movie.8:36 PM: Thief upgraded to office supplies once again. Always assuming the best of people, perhaps the robbery was to aid a student in his schoolwork and our pickpocket couldn’t find a portable stapler in any accessible backpacks.

Thursday, April 1910:40 AM: And back to targeting students, the klepto strikes again.10:43 PM: Suspicious person reported in the Healey Library. Everything found secure when said dodgy person was identified as a student leaving the computer lab.

Saturday, April 212:11 PM: Firefighters made their way out to UMass Boston only to discover a false fire alarm, thus no fire.