Dear Lovechester and Pussycat: I am at my wit’s end with my ex. He refuses to accept that we’re broken up and I do not want to give it another chance. He tells me he can’t let me go and he’ll never give up. He sent roses to me at work to try and “fix things.” He came by my house (drunk) at 3 a.m. and was outside tapping on my window. And I even told him I’m seeing someone else! I’ve tried being nice, and I’ve tried being mean. I’ve ignored him completely and that doesn’t seem to get my point across either.  I don’t want to have to take legal action because he’s not dangerous, just thick headed and selfish. I care about his wellbeing, but now I care about my sanity more. What should I do? Sincerely, One Fed Up Girl Dear Fed Up: You’re right to be fed up.  He’s encroaching on your life, taking advantage of your willingness to care about his wellbeing.  You’ve made it clear that it’s over, and he just needs to respect that.  You need to put your wellbeing first, not his.  Unfortunately, your ex has an illness right now-obsession.  Every contact you have with him just feeds that illness, so you need to cut him out of your life-for your sake and for his.  You have to step up the ignoring.  Block him on your cell phone; block his email address.  That way you don’t have to think about or worry about having a message from him.  Honestly, I’m really worried that he showed up at your house.  That’s borderline behavior.  You should talk to someone about a restraining order, even if you don’t file it.  However, if he shows up uninvited again, be prepared to file it.  I cannot stress enough how seriously bad his behavior has gotten; it sounds like stalking and it IS dangerous to your wellbeing and to his.  There are no excuses for his behavior, so don’t make them. This not acceptable under any circumstances.  Be safe! In concern, Lovechester Have you got a burning question for ‘Cat & ‘Chester? Send an e-mail to [email protected]. Your privacy is guaranteed.