And with two simple words, Tom Brady broke the hearts of New Englanders. No, it wasn’t “I’m retiring.” Instead, the three-time Super Bowl champ finally said “I do” and tied to the knot with supermodel girlfriend Gisele Bunchden last Thursday in Los Angeles. Gisele wore Dolce & Gabbana, as did her three dogs, who were also part of the ceremony.

Move over A-Rod – there’s a new steroid sheriff in town, and it is…Jewel? The folk singer admitted this week that she’s using steroids to slow the swelling in her knee so that she can continue competing on “Dancing with the Stars.” Next thing you know, she’ll be cranking 450-foot homers and dating Madonna. Get her off the juice!

Megan Fox is now single! The “Transformers” star recently broke off her engagement to former “90210” star Brian Austin Green last week, saying she was “too young” to get married. What the 22-year old meant? She wants to date someone who’s worked in the last decade.

“Hills” star and professional pretty boy Jason Wahler has called off his engagement to Katja Decker Sadowski. The 22-year old claims it’s because he and his 21-year old fiance are too young. The fact that he can’t even spell her name also probably sped up the breakup.

Nadya Suleman, the mother of octuplets, claims that a Los Angeles area hospital might not release her children to her based on her lack on income. Adult video company Vivid has offered her $1 million to appear in a porn movie, post pregnancy. Nadya’s 15 minutes of fame are nearly up, and nobody wants the last few of those on camera.

Paula Abdul has come under fire lately after claiming that “American Idol” doesn’t work with four judges. New judge Kara DioGuardi responded by saying that she was “hurt” by Abdul’s comment. Now, Abdul is backing off, claiming she was taken out of context. I’m with Paula – she more positive than Nadya Suleman’s pregnancy test.