Why is it The Mass Media has not written an article about me? I understand that I belong to no campus organization, do almost nothing constructive, and offer little to the UMB community (I transferred to UMB at the start of the spring semester. But that’s not the point. I feel that my very existence merits Mass Media attention. But have I received an e-mail from them? No! Or a phone call? No, because I don’t have a phone at home! Why haven’t I been sought out? I frequently see frivolous content in The Mass Media every week. For example: stories about state budget problems; the Opinion, Art, and Sport sections, and (Though I must admit that Captain Ribman comic is a fine segment of the newspaper). I’m not asking for much, just a feature story of about 1500-2000 words accompanied by three or four photos of me. Until The Mass Media remedies this situation, I will continue to badger them with letters to the Editor, noisemakers and water balloons, not necessarily in that order. And no, I am not a crackpot.

(Terribly) Undecided 06